Posts Tagged ‘weather’

it’s mardi gras outside

February 17, 2010

The past few days when I wake up it’s been snowing, though there’s not much on the ground. It’s a running theme. Definitely the snowiest winter I’ve seen, and that’s not saying much. My friend EJ in Southern Ontario says they’ve had a relatively snow-less winter. Similarly, the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver suffer from a lack of snow. We need to send some of the white stuff from D.C. to B.C.! (Ha…I wonder how many other shithead bloggers have already coined that one.)

Just today in Mesoscale we covered lake-effect snow, the kind most Ontarians usually deal with. This was right after I presented my forecast for Seattle. See, all B.S. meteorology seniors and some of the geography grad students at Western are participating in this national pay-to-play forecast contest. The forecast city changes every other week. We started off with Atlanta, and now it’s Seattle. Let me tell you, forecasting for Seattle (especially precipitation amounts) is a bitch.

(The funny thing is the models are showing a huge cutoff high developing over British Columbia and the Alaskan Gulf by the end of the week, bringing above-freezing temperatures as far north as the Yukon Territory, while the eastern half of the continent remains frozen. Those poor bastards in Vancouver.)

It was my second forecast discussion in two days. TJ (not related to EJ) and I gave a synoptic-scale discussion for the 424 Analysis & Forecasting kids on Monday. Drs. Goodrich and Durkee were present for that one.

EVERYTHING HAPPENS AT ONCE. This evening (immediately after the Seattle forecast and the lake-effect snow lecture) I started training for delivery at Mariah’s, a staple of Bowling Green dining. My friend Mike is a waiter there and put in a good word for me. I know a few others, too, so it looks like a good place to be. Again, it seemed like the perfect night for training: we got orders from our best and worst tippers, so I know who they are. A cop pulled up lights flashing behind an employee’s car as he was leaving—haven’t yet found out what that was about. Just walked into the kitchen like he owned the place, too. I had to wash the smell of bacon off my hands when I got home. Seriously, though. I work in a restaurant.

Then I watched the second half of the Kentucky–Mississippi game with my downstairs neighbors. John Wall isn’t the only important UK player, but I see magic in that kid. (Also in DeMarcus Cousins’s headband. It’s a ball magnet!) But really, number 11? My favorite prime number?! It really is! And he’s got the double-L in his name: Wa11. Eleven is a special number to me. I was born on the eleventh. And my name is John Wi11iam Ho11and.

And he’s the Great Wall of Kentucky. And he’s younger than me. To tie it all together, just like there’s a Boston U. player named John Holland (with the prime number 23 on his jersey), there’s a meteorology student here named John Wall—but he spells it differently.

So begins Lent. I’ll probably be giving up sleep.

It was a new moon Saturday. It was Valentine’s Day Sunday. President’s Day Monday. Fat Tuesday. Ash Wednesday.

Get my drift?

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storm of the month

January 27, 2010

I’m not trying to make this a “weather blog.” But as a student of meteorology, I am going to talk about the weather. And right now there’s a winter storm on the horizon:

From what I can tell, everyone’s flipping out because this is a rare atmospheric set-up that has the POTENTIAL to unload a foot or more of snow in places that usually never see more than an inch or two, if that. (For a more comprehensive look, visit Landon’s Fast Forecast.) As far as TV weather people are concerned, this is a great opportunity for ratings. Please keep in mind, that’s all they care about. I overheard someone today saying “you just can’t ever trust these people” and though she probably meant the broadcast weathermen, it’s too easy for the general public to dismiss forecasting as pseudoscience. I’ve also heard some old guy drawl “They don’ know, they jes guess like we do” which is very stupid wisdom. But true nonetheless. We’re just better at guessing than you.

Actually I’m no good at guessing. I’m not even an atmospheric scientist, really. I just like weather.

I think there is a relationship between consciousness and atmospheric phenomena. Not too sure about cause and effect, but weather patterns tend to reflect what’s going on “at the surface,” i.e. in our daily lives.

This week, we hit the ground running at school. And right off the bat, here’s this perfect chance for a winter storm, for everyone to observe and document. Co-incidence? Exactly.

I run the risk of ruining my meager credentials by making such claims. But hey, I say this is a blog about weird Fortean shit, anyway. Let your hair down, science.

colt 45 only tastes good when you’re stoned

January 25, 2010

First Day of the Final Semester. The sky went from sunny to snowy to sunny again. Even thunder could be heard in the distance. I walked out of my first class (Spanish…como se dice) into the  thickest, fastest-falling snow I’ve ever seen in my north-deprived life. It was accumulating on people’s clothes as they walked. You couldn’t see off the hill.

Yesterday, the Day Before the First Day of the Final (Tenth!) Semester, there was this cute lil’ tornado in Robertson County, Tennessee.

There’s a good chance for snow towards the end of the week.

This is January.

idioteque

January 24, 2010

I woke up at two o’clock this morning to a raucous party downstairs, and the mental realization that the rising pop starlet Ke$ha is the same Kesha Sebert I went to middle school with. She told me I stunk one day in English class. At that time in my life I was an emotional tinderbox, so I said “fuck you” then put my head on my desk and cried. (I’ve had many, many worse days since, but then it seemed like the worst day of my life, of course.)

Now, more than a decade later, I see her transformed into an actual MTV nympho like Katy Perry or Lady Gaga, on primetime commercials singing her worldwide No. 1 single “Tik Tok” which she co-wrote with Dr. Luke and Benny Blanco.

How should I feel about this? Ignoring the suspicion that I’ve died and gone to the outer layers of hell, I can’t help but laugh. She is making such an ass of herself.

There’s a possibility that someone reading this might actually be a friend of hers. Do you remember the talent show at Woodland? She sang “Karma Police.” I played this waltz on the piano (which later became “Ztlaw” at Austin Peay—it’s on myspace, man).

I’m not saying she isn’t talented. And to her credit, she apologized for saying I smelled like shit that day. I never held a grudge against her. I also never thought she’d be selling her sex, her voice buzzing through dance clubs all over the world, videos of her picking through trash on YouTube. It’s surreal.

Another thing that’s surreal is this spring-like storm in January:

January has April showers, and two and two always makes a five.

What a crazy storm! That’s three, count ’em three low-pressure centers! Just look at the isobars! The spiky blue testicle of winter descends upon the Great Plains! (Just one.) This is the same wave that dumped rain on California a few days ago, and spawned that “tornado” in Sunset Beach, Orange County. It was really cute.